3 of #100daychallenge: writer + energy worker

This morning the pain in the left side of my body was so uncomfortable I laid in bed for a long time, rather than forcing myself to get up. My neck, shoulder and hip felt twisted and tight.

As I laid there feeling awful and frustrated, all I could do is surrender and stop wishing it would go away or that I knew how to fix it. As soon as I surrendered, I started doing some energy work without even thinking about it. I laid there gently acknowledging two points my body led me to, one near my left clavicle and one on the inner side of my left hip.  Slowly, I felt some softening and unwinding in my neck, shoulder and hip. It’s almost like a natural process of paring away the pain in thin sheaths.

Every time I get overwhelmed about life, I feel it in my body and it forces me to simply take a break and let myself be. Letting my body do the breathing for me and noticing just how much my body is always doing for me amidst being blasted with messages that it’s not good enough in too many ways. I sensed in this experience that the source of the issues is a pattern of holding in my left shoulder that is pulling everything out of alignment. This is why I am grateful to be an energy work practitioner. It allows me to let myself trust my own experiences and know what I know for the good of myself and others.

I laid there with my eyes closed for awhile and suddenly, I heard my brother-in-law talking to my sister on the phone. He was downstairs in the kitchen, which isn’t even directly below me. The curious thing is that I could feel the vibrations of his voice coming through the wood of my bed frame, through the synthetic feathers of my pillow and I thought about how this sound and vibration was traveling through the entire structure of the house and everything in it. What a down to earth way to experience the connectedness of everything and the impact of one person. The power of sound, frequency and vibration — surely, each its own significant part yet inseparable and seemingly impossible to isolate from one another.

Our bodies are our instrument. We are aware of this to some degree. Mostly, in the way that we are aware that we have the power to tune-in and create a range of sounds, frequencies and vibrations through our intentions and truths. The role of musician takes up most of our attention and it is important. However, it’s also important to remember that we are the instrument. This is an advantage that we don’t always make time for — understanding our own design and mechanisms from the inside out.

Our bodies naturally pick up on and are receptive to the nature of a particular sound, frequency or vibration. Truth. It is complex and subtle, undeniable and we cannot manipulate it in the way we think we can. Someone always knows when the truth is separate from the message being transmitted. That someone is whomever is delivering or receiving the message. The problem we have is that we know things we cannot unknow in our bodies. The mind may be satisfied to fool itself, but the physical and energetic body have awareness of all the truths. This is why we develop energetic blockages. See the gap that is created in the whole if the mind is denying the body in places? It’s not bad. It’s just the truth and part of the maintenance of being human. I am an honest person as much as possible, but least to myself. I deny myself. I don’t believe myself. I don’t listen to myself. I take messages and interpret them in a way that serves my ego desires to adorn myself in ways that keep parts of myself hidden. Or, I ignore the messages and develop anxiety, become sluggish and perpetually dissatisfied with myself and almost everything I encounter.

We spend much time worrying about and carrying energy, sound and vibrations with us — these are the spinning thoughts and emotions in our minds and bodies. There is a distinction that needs to be considered here, because did anyone do something to make you keep spinning those thoughts in your head long after the interaction or the event? It was not the other person and it will be impossible to find real peace and relief until this is acknowledged. Once that is done, we find ourselves at the space where we begin to see that what we must do is learn to work with ourselves to stop choosing self-torture and self-destruction.

This is getting complex, but this is where we have to consider that perhaps we took something away that confirms what we think about ourselves — usually in relation to others and our place in the world, why we feel less than and what makes life difficult for us.

If you want to explore connectedness — sound is an excellent way to learn more. All you need to do is sit quietly and listen to the sounds around you. Notice the frequency and vibration of the sound. Notice how your body feels and responds to sound. Are you able to sense how sound and vibration seep in and create little openings in your body? Does the sound fill you or flow through you? Do you feel separate or a part of the sound?

Sound can connect you with your heart, your sense and the oneness that you embody and are a part of. Where does the sound go when you stop hearing it? In my experience, I sense it is still there and can be picked up again by an instrument or awareness at anytime. Imagine how many different sounds live within your being. Some of them, many of them happy, but for some reason the ones we do not want are the loudest. How do we free ourselves from the ones that torment us?

Meditation and other practices, like exercise and energy work, allow us to shift our focus toward what supports us and allows the other stuff to dissipate or transform because we see that we have choice.

Follow @blueprintwellness.life to see my #writing #alltheloveandnoexcuses #100daychallenge unfold.

Brightly,

Laura

I am a writer + energy worker [without question]

2 of #100daychallenge: Bite by bite. Write!

I meditated with Oprah & Deepak’s 21-day meditation before I started writing today. Sometimes, I listen to the meditation while lying in bed, because I feel too tired to sit. This morning, I sat in my chair at my desk in easy pose and enjoyed the experience. So many thoughts pass through my mind and sometimes I know where they come from within me, but other times thoughts or “visions” will surprise me. Today, I saw the image of an apple and the action of biting into that apple with great excitement and pleasure. It brought in thoughts about Eve and Adam in the Garden of Eden. I never really know what I thought about that story, because I've witnessed too many discussions that resulted in personal and spiritual harm. Today, I let my mind go in that direction.

What can I learn from that story right now, I wondered?

bite into curiosity
I M A G I N E
one bite changed an entire creation
I M A G I N E
one human's impact on an entire collective

I am reminded of why I choose to not share my thoughts in writing beyond a select few most of the time. It can be worrisome to know that I cannot control what others will choose to learn and take with them. My preference is to avoid instigating the creation of negative thoughts and energy in the collective awareness as a result of something I am sharing. When I get quiet, I hear and see the truths about what destruction, excess and support really look like in my thoughts, intentions and choices. This is a form of mindfulness that I have been practicing, because I am aware that I have choice and that my visual, verbal and energetic contributions have impact. Intention matters. My intention is for my choices to align with expression that connects and uplifts.

What I can learn from that story right now is to write with curiosity “bite by bite,” because this allows the practice to become less serious and more interesting. Curiosity is the key that opens the door to imagination. Imagination is the space where so many of us go to get away from the forms and constructs that bind us, so that we may dream, ideate, and create as seriously and/or playfully as we feel. It doesn’t matter if what I’m taking away isn't what the creator intended when I've found clarity and learned more about myself. Learning more about myself is helping me see how I can have a positive impact on creation and the collective. And, now I see, it's my turn to let what is, be.

What are you learning today?

All the love and no excuses,

Laura
@blueprintwellness.life

1 of #100daychallenge: writing

My friend, Kate, is on day 92 of her 100 day challenge and it's been really fun to see a new monster each day. I have a daily kundalini meditation practice and am on day 67 of my lifetime. I don’t intend to stop, but I’m not ready to stop counting because it keeps the flow of my practice going. We recently talked about how having a daily practice transforms and fortifies who we are and how we approach life and work. For me, this kind of practice is the embodiment of what I call #alltheloveandnoexcuses, my own hashtag, mantra, approach, or life principle that connects me to power, grace and honor for myself and others.

I am inspired by Kate’s monster work and #100daychallenge, so I’m taking her up on the suggestion to do my own 100 day challenge to:

• Stop rebelling against my writing goals

• Get myself to write everyday

• Share my writing with others

• Accept myself as a writer

• Be a better writer

• Lighten up and have fun

Follow @kate.jjj on instagram, she's the real deal and is making art constantly!

Follow @blueprintwellness.life to see my #writing #alltheloveandnoexcuses #100daychallenge unfold.

Brightly,

Laura