38 of #120daysadhana: How to write a book
I am here. Here I am. Today is a new day. Today has been gray and rainy. Rainy days are like permission to just come home and be whatever way I want to be. Suddenly, I become aware of my extraordinary experience similar to the way I become aware of the space between while meditating. It’s like waking up early in the morning without an alarm, because I’m a morning person.
There was a time when I was a morning person through and through. For awhile now, I’ve been like a stifled morning person. I am not miserable and grouchy, but I am slow moving, desperate for more sleep and slow to fully wake. I really like life. It can be a challenge to be shifting gears all of the time, so I sometimes wish that I could be awake all the time or be asleep all the time. For the most part, I enjoy my life through my inner experience the most. I have my own innate virtual reality that I am living all throughout the outer experience called reality. It’s really hard to tell what’s outer and what’s inner sometimes. Asleep and awake are maybe just states of awareness just like everything else.
Life is cool and confusing. Right now, I am pretty tired still from yesterday and I feel little like I’m in a dream state. Being tired is good and not good. It creates some separation between me and my experience because I’m in more than one place at once. I think this is something that is happening with the increase of all the different frequencies due to technology as well as the frequencies of disillusionment, hate and fear in the world. These frequencies are sensed by and affect our physical and energetic bodies whether we are aware or not. More and more of us are finding ourselves feeling distracted or fragmented and not present or disconnected and disoriented in the physical world. Maybe this all sounds like made up excuses, but I know this to be real for me. Restful sleep can help boost awareness and our ability to decrease how much and how often we dissociate from ourselves physically, emotionally and spiritually. Honestly, I did just make all of that up, but I also considered it and realized that I believe it to be true at this time.
I’m looking forward to sleep! I already did Sobagh Kriya and had some really cool experiences in 11 minutes. I just need to write my 500 words and then I can get to bed.
Completely,
Laura