22 of #120daysadhana: How to write a book

I am here. Here I am. Today is a new day. As I was typing the title of this blog post, there was a little jab of a thought that came in and said, “How not to write a book,” is probably a more accurate title. Haha. It’s true! I’m not sure if this daily blog post is helping my book writing process. Sometimes it is and the rest of the time, I’m not sure if it is more of a procrastination tactic. Whatever the case, it’s fun and I’m enjoying it, and I am finding new ways to understand myself and my experience. I am also strengthening my commitment to myself, my practice and my purpose. Even though I understand my purpose and I’ve been doing some work, I am still making my way up from below ground level. There are things I understand about myself and my process that have led me to the current approach. When it comes to nurturing the parts of me that are really important, there are best practices that I have learned over time and must keep in mind. Do not expose to direct sunlight. Handle with care and do not under or over water. Allow plenty of space on all sides 360 degrees. Will naturally grow in the direction of light source. Hardy. Let be.

I don’t like when I feel like I talk too much. I don’t like when I feel like I don’t talk enough. There are times when speaking is the right form of expression for me. I think there are a lot of ways to express ourselves and communicate. Non-verbal communication is often the most important kind of communication, whether or not words are being spoken. Words are sound or frequency and vibration. Words have definitions, meanings and resonance. We have fun with words and resonance to create experiences or show who we are or to help others feel comfortable. We practice witchcraft with our sound, frequency and resonance and we are in the habit of delivering potions, intoxicating brews and poisons encapsulated by words that are are meant to appear logical and benign. When we tweak the elements in a way that pushes them outside their natural range, on some level we get stuck holding them in that position and eventually, it starts to affect us. We become weary of holding ourselves in an unnatural position. We become perpetually aware that a significant shift outside of our control will be needed in order to release ourselves and move on. We’re afraid of the destruction that will occur. I’m attempting to convey the images that I’m sensing, so the writing here is probably clunky and incomplete, but I have to keep writing and can go back later to connect all of the pieces and smooth it all out.

The point is that we have access to great power if we are willing to learn how to work with the instrument that is our physical and energetic bodies. We can create and attune to different ranges of frequency and vibration that come from our own sound. The natural rhythm and harmonies of who we are despite everything else is the highest quality of resonance, it matches who we truly are and attracts people and things of a similar quality and state.

I’m getting tired now. I think I got a lot of the words jumbled in what I wrote above, but the idea is there, I’ll just have to sort it out. I am conscious of my own sound. I always have been. I have always been very self-conscious. Not necessarily in a “bad” or “good” way, but perhaps in a way that can get in my way or show me my way. The more challenging part about all of this is that thoughts are frequencies and vibrations, too. It matters more what we think than what we say. I’m pretty sure this is true, because of a multi-level structure of reasoning and considerations. Our thoughts are what is being communicated non-verbally and our bodies are receiving this communication constantly, regardless of our level of awareness. We haven’t learned to be honest about our abilities to communicate voluntarily and involuntarily. This is where it all comes back to the awareness or the field or one or whatever terminology or concept relates to each person reading this at this time. These words, terminology, definitions, meanings, concepts are such a perfect example of the human experience. The very thing we rely on to communicate and find connection through, is also the source of major miscommunication and disconnection. We would all do better to sit in each other’s presence quietly for periods of time in order to learn more and find connection. I believe this is true and possible.

It’s late now, I will come back and read through this again. It’s feeling like fragments strewn about the page. I just remembered the nice conversation my daughter and I had in the car on the way home after lacrosse practice. She said something about how she doesn’t really talk because she doesn’t have anything to say and small talk seems like a waste. I agreed with her. She’s so wise and aware. We haven’t talked about the power of voice and resonance, so maybe I will ask her what she thinks and experiences. I get overwhelmed by how awe-some she is. She came and made the world a whole different place for me. I must be someone special! It’s like I get messages and gifts through other people to help me understand that I am a gift, too.

Completely,

Laura